I’ve been building anyway. Teaching, directing, writing in the margins of exhaustion, and turning rejection into rehearsal. I say yes to the long road because I believe in the work more than I believe in the no’s. I’m still looking for the publishing house that feels like home, the theater that recognizes itself inside my stories, and the studio that honors the in-between, but until then, I keep making. I keep pressing. I keep loving the work out loud.
Excerpts from Mayers’ latest book, Tomorrow 12:01: A Collection of Docu-Poems Celebrating the Stories of Those Affected by HIV
“I HAVE FAITH” - VINCENT PT1.
by Lester Mayers
MOTHER:
i don’t agree with your lifestyle
somethings you should have shame in
SON:
mama i wish you can understand
that this is not a lifestyle
styles can be switched.
this is who i am.
MOTHER:
if you wanna be a flaming faggot,
make sure you wrap it up
bad enough as it is.
don’t need to add to it.
SON:
add to what mama?
MOTHER:
you know…
SON:
i don't know…
MOTHER:
don’t add to the hard life ahead of you.
SON:
but that's what you’re doing right now, mama/
MOTHER:
boy cut the dramatics/
SON:
mama i ain't being dramatic
i tell you who i am & you said you don’t agree
since when did the legitimacy of identity come with waivers of agreement?
MOTHER:
watch your tone, boy!
i brought you into this world
& i can take you
out/…
SON:
i wish you would’ve taken me out
because sometimes it feels easier to die
than to love somebody without grief & fear
i’m telling you
i found somebody
i wanna spend the rest of my life with
& all you can do/
all you have in you
is unexplained bitterness.
i didn’t choose my life mama
-
but i am here
i am right here
you did nothing wrong
& i hope you can see that.